If you’d asked me a year ago if my writing was going well… Let’s be honest here, you wouldn’t have asked me, because I’d never told anyone it was what I wanted to do.
As I’ve previously discussed, it was only due to being in a low place that I actually began to write, and then I kept it secret. It was only as I realised I had the basics of a book, that I told my best friend. She kindly read it for me after I made her promise a hundred times not to laugh, to tell me the truth if she hated it, and not to let anyone else see.
At this point we were still only allowed to meet one person outside so we walked around the park in the cold while she told me how much she’d loved the book – it didn’t even have a name at this point. She told me how it had made her reflect on an earlier period of her life and view it in a different way. It completely warmed my heart that my writing had touched someone in that way.
I gave two more copies out to people and got more good feedback. At this point I still couldn’t even discuss it without blushing and feeling embarrassed. I realised though – I wanted to publish this book. I wanted people to read it.
I briefly looked into traditional publishing, querying for agents and so on. I am one of the most impatient people in the world, and when reading accounts of this taking years IF it even happened, I just decided to go Indie.
Independent publishing isn’t easy, actually writing the book is the tip of the iceberg. The need for marketing is huge, or else how will anyone even know the book exists? When I created the social media pages for Nicola Lowe Author I felt like the biggest fraud in the world. How could I even call myself an author? The first people I invited to those pages were friends, family and colleagues – I was finally admitting my dream to the world and it was scary!
Even if some people did think I was crazy for calling myself an author, the support I received was superb. I apologised to my best friend at one point for going on about the book constantly, she simply said, “I’ll never get fed up of hearing about your books. You’re an inspiration to us all.”
I came so close to giving up at one point, it would have been the easier option. But if I had – I wouldn’t be living this right now. Amazing things have happened the past few weeks and I often have to pinch myself to check it’s real.
I may have only been writing for six months but I’ve definitely grown as a person. I feel more confident and when I sit down to write in an evening, it’s with a huge smile. I feel like I should’ve been doing this all along. I’ve made new friends, I have my first fan (other than people who already knew me!) in beautiful Texas, and everything is looking great for release day (July 1st 2021 just in case you missed it!)
Tomorrow I’ll probably be a nervous wreck again, full of doubt, but today I feel like I’m exactly where I’m meant to be – that’s such a good feeling.
If you have a dream, whether it be to write, to draw, to swim with sharks, to backpack around the world… whatever it is please don’t ever feel you left it too late, and don’t ever be embarrassed about it.
Our dreams are uniquely ours, nobody else can dream and live them for you.